Language Language Language

If I type how I think, raw without self edit, it can confuse people. It doesn't mean I am stupid, but that my speech as a whole is impact by disorder. Not just the mouth, but the brain, does not wish to cooperate. There is no difference to me whether I say "I'm going out and getting some coffee" or " I'm go out and get some coffee" because it's the mouth. Everyone knows. I will return with coffee. Simple. Easy. I don't do this when I write and it takes forever to edit it out, but it makes me want to scream when I see myself do it online in simple posts. I work so hard and I know that I'm doom to sound stupid. I wrote at a graduate level, my score in science and math were great, and teachers had high hopes for me. Now my husband says "Can you get two cans of fruit and three of beans?" and my brain stalls and spins until I can get through it or he gives up on me. I can't hold numbers in my head. I can't hold information in my head. All I can't do comes out in speech abnormalities. I drop the -ing and -ed unconsciously. When I look back and see it, I despair for what has become of me?

Feb 5th 2026